I hope the door hits ya where yer legs split ya, 2014!
Personally I suppose I can't complain too much, what with my getting back to working and contributing to society once again in some small way, but I still don't know if any of my progress was worth it given what the family unit suffered as a whole. My dad's health is better though, and I'm very grateful for the docs at Gundersen for their awesome care of my ol' man, but if we could have avoided any medical shit (literally) altogether that would have been much more agreeable. Do not take your colon for granted people, this is what I've learned this year. You don't know how much your overall health relies on proper poopin' until the small intestine turns on ya. A little TMI, I know, believe me, I know. They believe the cause was my dad's tobacco use in his youth (Pops is 70 and he quit around 30 years ago when my ma made him), but that was enough for it to catch up with him.
And guess whose baby brother is on the chew and also having toilet difficulties? Mine...... You think he woulda had a pretty good reason not to watching our dad this past year, but he's determined to be as redneck as possible. I'm fine with his having the big truck and love of firearms, but the chew (that I always seem to be the one cleaning up in our bathroom) and the casual racism I could do without. We're a very liberal, open-minded household so how he got to be this way is a mystery, as far as the youngest son's rebellion in a family can go anyway. Oh well. There's nothing I can really do about it. He's 20 and determined to do what he wants. It's sad to say it, but the only way he'll learn is if he has to suffer through it himself, and even then I'm not sure it's enough. Typical young man though, right? And yet my other brother isn't much like that at all. They both have big egos, but Peter is a bit more down to earth. Guess it's in the name? (Peter=rock, Paul=small - thus determined not to be small?) I dunno, but they're my lil brothers and so I try to do my best as big sis to keep them on a somewhat decent path.
My lil sister though, who you'd think was actually older than me given her maturity, has also accomplished a lot this year. She's lost over 100 pounds, gained some confidence, graduated college (can't escape her grocery store job for another, but that's a story we've all heard by now, right?). So she's our house's inspirational figure meanwhile I'm at the heaviest I've ever been and despite being unhappy with my puffy tummy have yet to crack down on my eating and exercise habits. Not that I'm diminishing my sister's accomplishments. She has to fight against Polycystic ovary syndrome (a condition that might be genetic from my dad's side of the family and which may explain a few things with my body, but she got the worst of it with the dark hair and weight gain and REALLY sporadic periods) and probably some depression I'd imagine given the struggle of being overweight. None of us girls in my family deal very well with anxiety, but we endure for a hell of a long time before we crack. Now if any of you are in a similar situation, there's really not much I can tell you that was the magical cure all for my sister. She says it's the Dorothy Gale approach "you have to discover it for yourself", and that meant balancing her meals and getting exercise that were appropriate for her (she still indulges in chocolate with me and loves her Pringles). Her meds only help steady her body's chemicals much like mine so any progress you can make you really hafta do on your own. I guess I'm still not motivated enough yet to tone my tummy. Though my belly is starting to pop through my shirts, my boobs don't wanna fit in my bras (and I think I have stretch marks) and if my ma tells me I look pregnant one more time when I'm bloated...... ugh. I get that she wants me to be healthy, but she's not nearly as supportive towards her "skinny" daughter who's nothing like her as she is the bigger one who's just like her.
I'll try and make 2015 "the year", but I'm still not all that super motivated, or even that excited about anything, other than that my savings account is steadily growing and I hope to use that money to travel. We never had the money to do any of that sorta stuff. Any trips I went on were always with a friends' family or part of a school activity. We're not "poor", but we're on the low end of the middle class making just enough to meet our necessities and not much else. It would help if our house would sell so we're not paying 2 mortgages, but I've been on that rant before so I won't go into it. Would just be nice to have a little less stress after this year, ya know?
Since I've been on about my family, I'll end with one last thing I've learned this year. Now I always knew we were weird for having two parents who loved each other enough to raise 4 kids in 3-bedroom houses, but both my brothers' girlfriends seem completely captivated by how we operate as a "family". We've always had our dinners together at the table and just talked. I knew this wasn't common place given how I'd see my friends with their families and such, but I didn't think it was anything a young 20-something would want, ya know? But both my brothers' girlfriends love coming here just to have dinner with us. I'm particularly friendly with my brother Peter's gf. She's from a very well off family, lots of vacations and no inkling of ever having hurt financially, so kinda what I've always wanted... but then she tells me she's jealous of us for always being there. Her parents aren't around given work and her older siblings are off on their own while the younger is off at school, so she's alone in that big house a lotta the time.... Typical story isn't it? Ya want what ya don't have, but I guess I think about Tiana's line from Princess and the Frog. "Daddy never had everything he wanted, but he had everything he needed." And I guess that's about where we're at. We've never really had all that we wanted, but we had all we need, love and laughter and plenty of problems to suffer through together. I still don't think I'd ever pass up a chance to have a more cushy life with more financial security, but for now this works for me just fine, and though I complain about a lotta things, the one thing I don't think I'll ever brood over again is my family.
Still don't see why we can't get a new four-legged friend in this family though, the joy a dog would bring us would definitely offset the cost of owning one. Goodness knows we probably are in need of a little stress reliever like that. But Ma hasn't budged on the issue yet and as supreme matriarch of our small abode, it's all her decision.
Anyway, not much else to say at this point other than I hope you all have a happy new year and that ya'll look forward to what I release in the coming year. Thank you for your support!